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Distress Tolerance

Pros & Cons of Acting vs. Not Acting

Pros & Cons helps you slow an urge by weighing what happens if you act vs. if you ride it out—both short-term and long-term.

What this worksheet is for

Pros & Cons helps you slow an urge by weighing what happens if you act vs. if you ride it out—both short-term and long-term.

How to use it

  1. Read the full skill once before writing.
  2. Use the examples below to spot where it fits real life.
  3. Complete the reflection page using the answers you already typed or by writing directly on the PDF.

At a glance

Primary topic: pros and cons dbt worksheet

Worksheet type: Secondary worksheet

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Worksheet overview

How to practice it

1

Define the urge or behavior

Name the action you are tempted to take (texting an ex, quitting your job, self-harm, skipping therapy).

2

List short-term pros and cons of acting

Be honest about the relief or payoff—and the immediate fallout—you’d experience if you follow through.

3

List long-term pros and cons of acting

Look past the first few hours. How would acting affect your goals, relationships, self-respect, or stability next week or next year?

4

List pros and cons of NOT acting

Identify the discomfort you’d sit with if you resist, and the long-term wins you get from staying on track.

Real-world examples

You want to ghost a friend after a misunderstanding. Short-term pros: avoid awkward talk. Short-term cons: anxiety about messages. Long-term pros of ghosting: none. Long-term cons: lose a solid friendship. Pros of not ghosting: repair a good relationship; cons: uncomfortable conversation. You decide the discomfort is worth the long-term trust.

You’re tempted to binge eat. Acting gives short-term numbness but long-term shame and health setbacks. Not acting brings short-term agitation but long-term confidence in your goals. You choose to text a DBT buddy instead.

Before you write

Pick one situation you are actually likely to face this week. The activity page works best when you complete it for a real moment instead of a hypothetical one.

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Practice guide

Worksheet activity

Practice Activity

Fill in the matrix for an urge you experience often. Keep it handy so you can review when the urge appears.

Reflect and write

What urge or behavior are you analyzing?

Short-term pros of acting? Short-term cons?

Long-term pros of acting? Long-term cons?

Short-term pros of NOT acting? Long-term pros?

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Reflection page